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“How Would You Feel About Having Ten Kids?”

“How Would You Feel About Having Ten Kids?”

I told you I ached to write. I promised you more personal blog posts. That was two months ago. You deserve an explanation.

Where in the World Is Paula?

The good news is . . . I have been writing. I’m sorry I haven’t posted here much. But let me fill you in on what I have been working on.

A friend has started watching Iren Mondays so I can explore the possibility of writing another book. (Yesterday that included soaking in a bubble bath while reviewing journal entries I’ve written since meeting Trevor. Not bad huh?)

I’m currently outlining four potential manuscripts. I don’t know for sure that any of them will materialize, but it’s worth exploring. Especially because I imagine our family will continue to grow, and carving out time to write will only become more challenging.

I’m also still writing for Revive Our Hearts ten hours a week. I try to put in two hours each weekday, preferably while Iren is napping.

“How Would You Feel About Having Ten Kids?”

The last project I completed for ROH was watching the Revive ’17 messages and writing descriptions for them. Iren helped.

His favorite part of the conference was singing along with the band. I was especially challenged by Robyn McKelvy’s message on counting children an asset and a blessing. When I finished watching it, I interrupted Trevor’s workday with a phone call, asking “How would you like to have ten kids?”

He said something like, “Let’s see if you still feel the same way in a week.” He knows me well.

More than the number of children we have, Robyn’s message challenged the way I think about children. She also encouraged me to really enjoy them. (Thankfully that’s getting easier and easier. Five-month-old Iren is a delight.) It was fun to hear some of Robyn’s practical examples of what she does as a mom as well.

One more message worth noting: Susan Hunt’s description of aging brought tears to my eyes–specifically the last sentence of her conclusion. Apparently I wasn’t the only one . . . she got a standing ovation. You can watch those messages–and more–here.

Back In the Saddle

I actually did write a post for this site, but at the last minute I sent it to Desiring God, and they plan to feature it on their blog November 7. It started out as a fun post about Trevor and morphed into a post about hospitality.

All that to say, thank you for your patience with me. I still plan on posting here!

If you haven’t yet subscribed to my blog, type your email in the box to the right under “Don’t Miss a Post!” and you’ll receive future updates in your inbox. (If you’re reading this on your phone, click on the menu button at the top and choose “Subscribe by Email.”) You can unsubscribe at any time.

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Two Travel Sagas with a Layover in a Neurology Hospital

Twice now Kimberly Wagner and I have traveled to exotic locations to speak at an event together. We met in Brazil in 2015, and a month ago at the Gospel Coalition Conference in Prince Edward Island, Canada.

Prince Edward Island . . . Or Bust

This past speaking engagement in Canada has been on our calendars since 2015. Our host kindly offered to let us stay a couple extra days with our spouses to be refreshed. It didn’t take more than a few seconds for Trevor and I to agree, “Prince Edward Island? Um . . . yeah!” Kimberly and her husband, LeRoy, also planned to take our host up on his kind offer.

That was before I was pregnant and gave birth to our son. And before we learned that Trevor wouldn’t be able to travel with us, as it fell during his busiest season at work.

It was also just before LeRoy began experiencing strange symptoms. These undiagnosed symptoms persisted for the next two years—right up until the conference. In spite of his declining health, LeRoy insisted that they keep their commitment. He and Kimberly set out from Arkansas the day after my mom, my son, Iren, and I left New York.

An Exhausting Day of Travel

woman and baby sleeping on plane

 

In spite of the fact that Iren is a peaceful baby, our travel was exhausting. After several delays, we arrived in Prince Edward Island twenty-two and a half hours later. Our luggage, however, did not.

Thank the Lord for the kind man at the front desk of our hotel. He fetched robes, toothbrushes, and deodorant for us, and we stumbled into our beds—and Pack ’n Play—at 4 a.m. Thankfully, I didn’t have to speak the next day.

Kimberly, however, was not so fortunate. She also arrived at 4 a.m., but she had to speak at 9:00 that same morning.

And while I got to see my protector-husband at his finest (Trevor went to bat for us, tweeting at and calling Air CANADA in search of our bags), Kimberly had to support her husband. Literally. Within forty-eight hours of their arrival, he couldn’t walk without her help.

I got to connect briefly with LeRoy and Kimberly at the conference, and you would never have known they were going through so much. They were as kind and others-centered as ever.

Once the conference was over, we said our goodbyes (I wanted to get back to my hubby!), but LeRoy and Kimberly had planned to stay a couple extra days to relax.

More Delays . . . with A Layover in the Neurology Hospital

Our travel home wasn’t much easier than our travel there. I’ll take our delays over Kimberly’s any day, though. While we were delayed hours, she and LeRoy were delayed weeks.

LeRoy collapsed in the hotel lobby while they were still in PEI, and he couldn’t get back up. They arranged for an earlier flight home with a connecting flight in Texas, so they could visit a neurology hospital in Dallas. That layover and ER visit turned into an unplanned eighteen-day stay. LeRoy was finally discharged . . . with more questions than answers, and a whole lot of medical bills.

The Journey from Here

Leroy and Kimberly Wagner

This journey is far from over for them. Would you cry out to God on their behalf? Here’s the latest update so you can pray knowledgeably.  

Also, if you’ve been touched by Kimberly and LeRoy in person or through their writing, would you consider giving financially to help them pay their medical bills?

I texted Kimberly asking if they have insurance, and she told me they’re a part of Samaritan Ministries. She’s hoping that will cover a large portion of the hospital cost (which they have to pay up front), but it doesn’t pay for LeRoy’s medications. And these meds aren’t cheap. These dear friends are looking to God to provide, and you can help answer their prayers.

Thanks for taking the time to read our stories, when I know you have your own delays, illnesses, or other challenging circumstances. Big or small, may you walk intimately with God today, knowing that He is in control, and that He is good.

I leave you with this post Kimberly wrote about LeRoy while they were in the hospital. It’s one of the most touching posts I’ve read in awhile, as it shows the impact of walking with God intimately for years.

As the Wagners want more than anything else, may God be glorified through your own current saga—and theirs.

This post was originally featured on TrueWoman.com as “Unexpected Travel Delays and an Unexplained Illness.”

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Back to Blogging Post-Baby

Hello there! It is so good to get back behind these keys post-baby. 

In the past three months I’ve pushed out a baby boy, survived the early days of insomnia and a new baby routine, prepped three new messages for a speaking engagement, and traveled out of the country with my son for said speaking engagement. Whew!  

The Baby Part

I don’t want to paint myself as some kind of wonder mom. Truth is, God blessed us with “Wonder Baby.” That’s what I call him. I do so quietly, though, so all the other new moms aren’t filled with envy.

Meet our son. Iren Daniel Marsteller joined our family on May 20. He was big. Over nine pounds. When the pediatrician first measured his head, he exclaimed, “How did you get him out?”

The answer to that would be “Trevor.” I never could have done what I did without his coaching; encouragement; and constant, strong pressure on my lower back.

I still can’t believe we did it. I don’t even want to look at the hospital when we drive by, and Trevor–with a twinkle in his eye–says he now understands how some people have PTSD. We’re not huge fans of the process.

But the result is so worth it.

We finally landed on our son’s name just before we were discharged from the hospital. (It’s a requirement, folks. The hospital turns into a prison until you land on a name for that little one.)  

Iren means “peace,” and Daniel means “God my judge”. We named him that so when people ask about his name, we can briefly share with them that our greatest need is to find peace with God the judge through Jesus.

Pray that Iren will find peace with God through Christ, and that he will cling to Jesus from an early age and point many to Him.

The Blogging Part

In the weeks to come I’ll share more about my struggles with learning I was pregnant, to life as a new mommy, to the three new messages I prepped and our travel to the latest speaking gig, and much more.

I haven’t been this excited to write in a long time. I ache to write, the way I ached for Iren when his grandparents took him for the first time for a few hours.

In addition to continuing to write for other blogs, I want to do more personal writing here. Trevor and I do a lot of hospitality, and I’d like to welcome you into our lives. Complete with baby pictures.

If that sounds like something you’d be interested in, type your email in the box to the right under “Don’t Miss a Post!” and you’ll receive future updates in your inbox. (If you’re reading this on your phone, click on the menu button at the top and choose “Subscribe by Email.”) You can unsubscribe at any time.

Now it’s your turn. What has occupied your summer? What are you getting back to, now that summer is drawing to a close? I’d love to hear.

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So You Want To Write A Book?

So You Want To Write A Book?

This post from the archives has been freshly updated and expanded with my three main tips for those who want to write a book. Enjoy!

I often hear from aspiring writers asking for tips on how to make their dream of becoming a published author come true. Here are three steps I recommend for those whose eyes are set on a writing career.

Explore Your Motivation to Write

Why do you want to write? Why do you want to publish a book? Motivation matters—big time.

In 1 Samuel, we see the Israelites demanding the prophet Samuel to appoint them a king. There was nothing technically wrong with wanting a king (see Deuteronomy 17:14–20 for proof). The problem was why they wanted a king. Here it is, straight from their mouths:

“There shall be a king over us, that we also may be like all the nations, and that our king may judge us and go out before us and fight our battles” (1 Sam. 8:19–20, emphasis added).

God had a flawless record in fighting their battles for them, but they wanted a king who looked and acted like the kings of the nations around them. This was a direct rejection of God:

And the LORD said to Samuel, “Obey the voice of the people in all that they say to you, for they have not rejected you, but they have rejected me from being king over them” (v. 7, emphasis added).

God gave His people the king they wanted, but He warned them through Samuel that the day would come when they would cry out to God for relief from their king. On that day, God would not answer them (see vv. 10–18).

Motivation matters to God. And it should matter to us.

I’d encourage you to take some time to journal through these questions. Ask God to search your heart. Why do I want to become a well-known writer? Why do I want to publish a book? If you find less-than-lovely motives (or more like when you find less-than-lovely motives), confess them to God. Ask Him to cleanse you from sinful desires and to replace your ungodly motives with pure ones.

Write Like You Mean It

If you want to become a writer, you have to write. And write. And write. Dreaming won’t put words on the page.

If you’re anything like me, it’ll take you awhile to figure out what routine fits you. Try different options until you’ve figured out what works best in this season of life.

  • Are you an early riser . . . or could you be? Wake with the roosters, and write at a set time each morning.
  • Do you need a good amount of time to “get into the zone”? Maybe an extended Saturday date at Barnes & Noble would be just your thing. Consider inviting a friend along for accountability and an occasional laugh.

Warning: This will feel like work. Hard work. Because it is. This is why it’s important to know why you’re writing (back to that motivation thing). You’ll need a solid reason to sit down at your laptop again when others are out enjoying the sunshine with friends.

Don’t always choose writing over time with friends, though. You’ll need to read diversely and live well so you actually have deep thoughts to ponder, adventures to write about, questions to answer.

Once you’re into a rhythm of writing regularly, you might want to think about starting a blog (I recommend WordPress), so you can begin to grow an audience and so others can benefit from your words.

Once you’ve mastered the discipline of writing regularly, there’s one more thing to do.

Something Your Profs Won’t Tell You

Bestselling author Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth (author of nearly twenty books, with more than three million copies sold worldwide) never set out to become an author. She was approached by a publisher for her first book when she wasn’t well known. When I first heard that, I thought, Well, that worked for you, but then . . . you’re Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth. You’re special!

But then, miracle of miracles, it happened for me, too. Unbeknownst to me, a publisher had been reading my blog, and then they approached me about writing a book. Professors never even tell you that’s a possibility when you’re sitting in Writing 101! They spend all their time warning you that you’ll have to submit countless query letters and will receive scores of rejection letters.

There’s nothing wrong with sending query letters, but I think those writing profs would do well to also remind hopeful students that they live under God’s providence. While we were still unformed, God wrote in one of His books every day that was formed for us (Ps. 139:16). This same God opens doors no one can shut and shuts doors no one can open (Rev. 3:7).

Wait on God

One of the twelve “Cutting-Edge Commitments” of Life Action Ministries (the parent ministry of Revive Our Hearts where I’ve worked for the past eleven years) is faithfulness. They say it like this:

God has not called us to be “successful,” as the world measures success, but to be faithful. It is not our responsibility to promote ourselves or the outward, visible growth of our ministry. If we will take care of the “depth” of our lives, God will take care of the “breadth” of our ministry” (1 Cor. 3:12–14; 4:1–2).

So my counter-cultural advice to you would be rest. Wait. Stay close to Jesus. Be faithful with what God’s entrusted to you, even when it looks like no one is watching, when you don’t know how this could possibly be advancing your own dreams.

Regularly talk to God about your dreams. He will most likely ask you to die to them. But then, He is the resurrection and the life, and I’ve found He will often resurrect dead dreams when you least expect Him to.

How about you? What dream could you begin to work toward today?

As I share in this post to college grads, be patient if it doesn’t happen right away. Trust God and know that He doesn’t waste anything; He is still writing your story. True contentment is found in Him; not in a dream job.

Pursue your dream job (as long as you don’t have to sin to do your job), and trust God to open and close doors in His perfect, infinite wisdom.

So You Want to Write a Book? was originally published on LiesYoungWomenBelieve.com. 

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